Beyond the Planet of the Apes

Now entering the Forbidden Zone - Picture courtesy of Wikipedia

by blogSpotter
This past week I watched a movie which can only be described as a guilty pleasure – Beneath the Planet of the Apes. It’s the 1970 sequel to 1968’s seminal, highly acclaimed Planet of the Apes, based on Pierre Boulle’s 1963 novel. The original movie was well-structured and conveyed some important messages about human arrogance and technology run amok. You might think it should be left alone, intact with its Academy award for ape costumes and all its thought provoking monkey business.

In fact, Apes spawned a business, media empire – 4 sequels, a comic book, a TV show and (very recently) a prequel “reboot” called Rise of the Planet of the Apes. This is a healthy franchise that will live forever; it rivals Star Wars in its staying power. Who knew that such a role reversal would have such a hold on us? There have been various spins placed on Apes … some liken the simian masters to the primal essence of humans (maybe a devolving of humans back into apehood?). In some ways this would hark back to King Kong of the 1930’s, where Kong was symbolic of a masculine, human id. Others have perceived a racist bent in Apes – maybe apes were used as a substitute for a race or nationality. I never really saw that angle myself.

Whatever the case may be, the first sequel, Beneath, is laughable. It involves the discovery of a race of subterranean, mutant humans. They inhabit the ancient Queensboro subway station and worship an undetonated nuclear warhead as God. I won’t give away what happens (does it matter?) but the chief impression I carry away is that the movie’s budget had to be in the thousands, not millions. The special effects are comically crude – fire that looks like orange cellophane and lightening that looks like something a kid might scrawl with a white crayon. Aspects of the movie remind me of Ed Wood’s Plan 9 from Outer Space. The mutants look like current day Teletubbies and the actors are robbed of all dignity – how many careers must this movie have squelched?

I think that if you must go from the sublime to the ridiculous, you could do better than this. Much in the tradition of Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, we should have Beyond the Planet of the Apes. In this sequel, a 3rd space ship lands in the Forbidden Zone. Astronaut Scott Smith strays into ape territory; he’s captured and brought in for observation by Zira the zoologist chimp. But Scott sees something in Zira’s eyes – a soul connection that transcends species. Zira feels the same. Scott and Zira escape (and elope) but not without enraging PETA and the Ape equivalent of Moral Majority. Because of their bestial love, they must run to the Forbidden Zone (double entendre is unavoidable). They stumble into the old subway station at Rockefeller Center. Here they discover a race of ape-humans who are very accepting of alternative lifestyles and who embrace the performing arts. At this point … the author is momentarily out of ideas – he needs a Starbucks refill.

The reader may email me with ideas of how to finish it, or give me guidance in the comment section of this blog. I feel that my Beyond version has as much validity as Beneath. Furthermore, the special effects would be minimal. It could be done for pennies and maybe be up for some musical awards. Will wrap this up by saying I have utmost respect for the original novel and its premise. I’m all the more thankful that we have these fertile imaginations – to take cinematic gold and turn it into unintended comedy gold.

© 2011 blogSpotter

Cosmic Fairy Tales

The blue fairy as God figure? - Picture courtesy of Wikipedia

by blogSpotter
Author's note -- My wonderful mother passed away at age 78 on August 16th. She was a fun, special lady and seemed younger than her age, always. She was diagnosed with late-stage pancreatic cancer and lived just 3 weeks with home hospice care after diagnosis. I don't know where anyone goes in the afterlife, but she will add to the joy and laughter wherever it is.

Magic Air

I'll tell a tale
of maidens fair
and dragons fierce
and magic air

I'll tell it not with words precise
or thoughts profound
or terms concise

A child can let the tale unfold
with whimsey, rhymes and actions bold
He'll open wide the shuttered door
To something other, something more

Today's blog is one I've touched on before in other articles, it's a personal favorite and well worth revisiting. In high school English class you were probably served topics like symbolism, metaphor and personification. Most teens find these topics about as exciting as cold oatmeal and would much rather be Tweeting or texting the hour away. When the method of delivery is a Percy Shelley poem or Moby Dick, the dry dullness becomes overwhelming. The literary devices mentioned above are far better understood and enjoyed as personal discoveries. Every other song, poem and fictional work in pop culture has some type of message between the lines – the sensitive listener will pick up and enjoy these (certainly when the topic is something about sex).

One area that is rife with symbolism is children's literature. Aesop and Mother Goose have a lot up their sleeves that our parents never imagined. Even when the message is fairly obvious (Emperor's New Clothes, The Tortoise and the Hare), adults are quick to flush it out of their minds – minds far too busy with Important Stuff. That's too bad -- the morals are so much needed in today's world.

Two of my favorite children's stories are Mary Poppins and the Wizard of Oz. Both of these are full of symbolism not the least of which is their God imagery. College freshmen, properly tanked up on beer, can dissect the importance of the Wizard, the yellow brick road and how it all relates to an emerald city. What was Baum really saying? Yet another movie that serves up miraculous metaphors is Pinocchio. This movie was masterfully delivered by Walt Disney in his 1940 animation, but has fallen into a certain level of obscurity.

Let me set forth some of the things that make Pinocchio a truly relevant, nay cosmic fairy tale:

o It offers not just a “God” but a hierarchy of intelligences – a cricket with conscience, a kindly human puppet maker and a blue fairy.
o It shows a physical consequence to lying – a consequence that gives Pinocchio a lengthened nose and turns hoodlums into braying donkeys.
o It shows a transformational experience – a wood puppet transforming into a live boy after demonstrating fortitude and human love.

It's getting late in the evening – I won't delve into the theological and cosmological bee hives the Pinocchio story kicks open. Even if you're set like quick-dry cement in your religious viewpoint you might still see some points to ponder. What is ironic is that children the world over can be delighted by the concepts presented – and Mommy and Daddy are just glad the rug rats are occupied with a DVD in the back seat.

Unless you've walled your children off in a home school with Veggie Tales on permanent replay, they should get a liberal exposure to a variety of ideas just looking at the classics. You can hammer your kids back into compliance at a later date if need be. Or maybe, just maybe let them open up their imaginations and discover a few things on their own. It might help them to be better rounded people and they'll later get high school bonus points for correctly interpreting Ozymandias.

© 2011 blogSpotter