Burgers and SquarePants

I like SquarePants and I cannot lie ... -- Picture courtesy of Burger King

by blogSpotter
I'd like to preface this by saying, "It's a free country". Now, it shouldn't be necessary to state the obvious but it turns out that would be incorrect. We seem now to have a whole squadron of "lifestyle police" to tell us how to live our lives -- even to the extreme of pulling TV programs and passing municipal ordinances to assure our basic goodness. Let me list some things that I, as a sentient adult, know are probably not good for me:
Cigarettes, alcohol, red meat, high fructose corn syrup, sugary cereals, and fried anything.

Nobody needs to wag a finger in my face, telling me these things are bad -- I can read warning labels, cholesterol charts and bathroom scales. Unless we're intending to reenact Prohibition from the 1930's, we'd probably rather have individuals empowered to make these choices at an individual level. Please, no arrests for eating a Twinkie or a bucket of fried chicken... the added pounds will be punishment enough. Unless these things I've mentioned are feeding into a crime network, the "crime" is pretty well victimless.

What brings me to this level of ranting?? Reaction to a prefectly valid Burger King commercial is what. It shows the Burger "King" (their mascot wearing a creepy King mask) dancing to a modified version of Sir Mix-A-Lot's 1992 hit "Baby Got Back". This version of the song is modified to promote a Burger King tie-in to SpongeBob SquarePants -- a toy is included with a children's meal. The song now goes, "I like SquarePants and I cannot lie ...". It shows a bevy of go-go dancers behind the King, dancing with what appears to be phone books stuffed in the back of their skirts. SpongeBob is shown gyrating to the same song on a nearby TV set. I have to say, the commercial is "adult-oriented" in a PG-13 way and it is hilarious. Look it up on YouTube for a good laugh. It seems that the Lifestyle Squadron, represented by "Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood" is appalled, simply appalled. They don't like read meat, Sir Mix-A-lot or lame, tame sexual innuendos. How "dare" Burger King tie this in with a children's beloved TV hero?

Where to begin? First of all have a f***'in since of humor, people. Political correctness and food police have nearly numbed our funny bone. Secondly, the commercial is played on shows like Family Guy and How I Met your Mother -- hardly shows that your kid should be watching anyway. Burger King fully understands the concept of appropriate audiences. The commercial is aimed at adult people who will actually be driving the car and making the purchase. Thirdly I might add, SpongeBob is a rather acerbic and adult-geared cartoon for anyone who's failed to see many episodes. SpongeBob is more in the teen domain of Bart Simpson than the kiddie domain of Dora the Explorer. I love the show myself, and I also love Sir Mix-A-Lot.

So where does that leave us? It leaves us with feely-mealy, overly sensitive thought police who know how to suck all the fun out of life. But guess what? Burger King is perfectly within its rights -- so are Sonic and Jack in the Box with their silly, guy-oriented commercials. It's called a free country. Appreciate it, Lifestyle Squadron, or get over it.

© 2009 blogSpotter