Geico is My Muse

Cavemen to debut this fall -- Picture courtesy of ABC

by blogSpotter
Now I've seen everything. ABC is developing a new sitcom, Cavemen, based on the cavemen characters in the Geico Insurance commercials. I've seen a few of these commercials and they're sort of cute, but nothing phenomenal. Maybe it's an age thing, but I'm not on the floor laughing from it -- can't imagine ABC finding inspiration in something so lame. But since the alternative seems to be Reality Television (the ultimate Neanderthal TV in my view), I have to applaud any effort that gets us back to scripted television. In that spirit, I'll offer my own sitcom pilot ideas, mining from the area of commercials:

Jack in the Sack -- In this high-concept dramedy Wendy (of Wendy's fame) is married to Ronald McDonald. After 5 years of marriage, he comes home from a long commercial shoot to find the Burger King's crown fallen back behind his pillow. Has Wendy found a new Big Mac Daddy? What he doesn't know is that Jack is hiding in the closet with his own special combo. Wendy has been getting condiments from several places. Tune in to see how Wendy and Ronald deal with their marital troubles in this sizzling series.

Get the Flock Outta Here -- The Aflac duck is fired by Aflac for being too obnoxious. At the unemployment office, he runs into the Serta counting sheep who have also been laid off by Serta. He becomes their agent then and there -- and gets them much better gigs for Memory Foam and Simmons. Hijinx follow as the Aflac duck ruffles some feathers in the bed products industry and the sheep get uppity after scoring a couple Clio awards.

Jenny Take A Ride -- Valerie Bertinelli has a food slip and goes to the Taco Bell drive thru. While driving away with her 6 Burritos and 12 Gorditas, she nearly runs over Kirstie Alley who is walking out with two party packs of Tacos. After getting over the initial shock of it all, the two actresses realize that they've been manipulated by the shallow media and should accept their natural shapes and food affinities. They become roommates and also national spokeswomen for NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) and discover an amazing new world of chubby chasers as well as Lane Bryant ad contracts.

I think my ad-to-TV concepts would shake up television and help to get us out of the doldrums of Survivor shows, bachelors handing out roses, and American talent contests. ABC must be on to something. You have to wince though when you think back to @ 1972. On one CBS Saturday night you would have All in the Family, Mash, Mary Tyler Moore and Carol Burnett. What an unbelievable lineup. An American network would be lucky to have one such colossus in a whole week nowadays, much less four in one night. Such is the sad state of TV. So Cavemen here we come. And you know, it might even be good.


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